"Four score and seven years ago our fathers brought forth on this continent, a new nation, conceived in Liberty, and dedicated to the proposition that all men are created equal. Now we are engaged in a great civil war, testing whether that nation, or any nation so conceived and so dedicated, can long endure." - Abraham Lincoln
A Contract to Fuck America
We hold these truths to be self-evident...
- Partisanship: That we show the conviction and courage to protect and defend the desires of our narrow constituency over the greater common good.
- Imbalanced Budgets: May we ignore the premise of fiscal responsibility, focusing instead on the goodness of pork. It's not our money, anyway.
- Inseparability of Corporation and State: The will of the corporation and big business must be kept front and center at all times. Today's senator is tomorrow's lobbyist, and vice-versa.
- Greed is Good, Socialized Risk is Better: Because we know that Wall Street will lead our economy to financial ruin from time to time, the US Government must act as its Safety Net but never try to regulate and police investment vehicles that even Wall Street itself can't understand.
- Corporations are not Responsible: The soul of Capitalism is The Corporation, and thus we honor the truth that its sole goal is to maximize profits. In God We Trust that these riches will trickle down.
Thank you. Good night. And God Bless the United States of America.
